UMUR "Them" is the 3th full-length studio album by multi-national heavy metal act King Diamond. The album was released through Roadrunner Records in September 1988. There have been a couple of lineup changes since the release of "Abigail (1987)", as guitarist Michael Denner has been replaced by Pete Blakk and bassist Timi Hansen has been replaced by Hal Patino. "Abigail" was a commercial and artistic success for King Diamond and the band didn´t rest on their laurels, quickly entering the studio after finishing the tour supporting "Abigail". "Them" turned out to be another great commercial and artistic success for the band, selling even more copies than the predecessor.

As it´s also the case with "Abigail (1987)", "Them" is a concept release telling a horror story. This time the story is also centered around a haunted house, but the story is quite different from the story of "Abigail (1987)". The protagonist of the story is King himself as a child, and the story begins with King, his sister Missy, and his mother waiting at their house for their wheelchair bound grandmother to return from a long vacation (which is later revealed to have been a longer stay at a lunatic asylum). The following night King awakes to the sound of voices and finds his Grandmother sharing bloody tea with invicible spirits (called "Them") speaking in strange tongues telling stories from beyond, and he is invited to join them.

The bloody tea has a hallucinogenic and an addictive effect and soon King becomes numb to reality and craves the nightly meetings with "Them", despite the fact that the blood in the tea is drained from his sleeping mother. When Missy discovers what is going on and why her mother is ill and tired all the time, she destroys the tea pot but is subsequently killed by the enraged "Them" (she is basically chopped to little bits with an axed wielded by invicible hands and then burned in the kitchen fireplace while King is watching in horror). After Missy is murdered King finally snaps out of this sedated state and lures his grandmother to leave the house. He has picked up the axe from the kitchen and beheads his grandmother. The story ends with King being taken away to a lunatic asylum accused of murdering his little sister and his grandmother.

Stylistically the 11 tracks on the 43:14 minutes long album continue the intricate and theatrical heavy metal style of the two preceding albums. King´s vocals are predominantly high pitched but he also sings more mid-range type vocals. The vocals are often multy-layered to create intriguing harmonies or choirs. The two guitarists produce sophisticated heavy metal riffs with the occasional nod towards more hard edged thrash metal style riffs. It´s the many neo-classical influenced guitar harmonies and skillfully played melodic guitar solos which are the icing on the cake though. Both Pete Blakk and Andy LaRocque are incredibly creative and each guitar solo has been meticulously crafted and is played with great care for detail. The rhythm section of drummer Mikkey Dee and bassist Hal Patino also deserve a lot of praise as they deliver powerful and tight (yet organic) playing, which drives the music forward with great energy. The music also features atmosphere enhancing use of keyboards.

"Them" is structured with an atmospheric horror intro, a short interlude track, and a short outro, so there are only eight "regular" length heavy metal tracks on the album. Great care has been taken with the tracklist to make sure that there is a good flow throughout the album and the short intro/outro/interlude tracks are important to help ensure that flow and the creepy horror atmosphere too. But it´s of course the "regular" tracks which are the most interesting part of the album. Tracks like "Welcome Home", "The Invisible Guests", and "Tea" are among the highlights of the album, but "Them" is a strong release throughout.

There is a slight issue with the rhythm guitar sound sometimes drowning a bit in the mix and there is a dryness to the sound, which isn´t always pleasent to listent to, but overall the sound production is enjoyable enough. It is the only minor issue with the album, but it has to be mentioned as it does affect my rating a slight bit. "Them" is in many ways a high quality release by King Diamond and a worthy follow-up to "Abigail (1987)", but to my ears the sound production does keep it from reaching the same masterpiece heights as the predecessor. Still a 4.5 star (90%) rating is fully deserved.

Vim Fuego King Diamond has one of the most remarkable voices in metal. His operatic falsetto wail was the outstanding feature of Mercyful Fate’s supernaturally powerful, distinctive sound. He then forged a successful solo career, along fairly similar lines, a little less technical, a little more theatrical. Diamond had done so much for metal. So why the hell did he inflict this monstrosity upon us?

There’s nothing wrong with the music on this album. Diamond has always assembled outstanding musicians, and the songwriting is impressive. The playing and arrangements are second to none. His voice is top notch. So what makes it a monstrosity?

The first clue is in the first few seconds of the album. “Out From The Asylum” is one of the cheesiest, stupidest introductions to an album ever. It’s just totally fucking silly. And it all just gets worse from there...

So, yeah, apparently Grandma has kangaroos loose in the top paddock, but it’s time to welcome her home from the asylum. What could possibly go wrong?

Grandma has a tea party with people who aren’t really there, but King is told to forget about it. Next, Grandma offers to teach him about Amon over another cup of tea, this time with Ma’s blood in it (hint: Amon isn’t Chris Amon, the motor racer who competed in 96 grand prix, and won the 1966 Le Mans 24-hour race).

There’s the voices of “them” which the album gets it’s name from, his sister Missy tries to stop “them, so “they” chop her to bits with a broken teapot, King stumbles outside, snaps out of the enchantment, kills Grandma, and ends up in an asylum himself. It’s such a dumb fucking story. If you’re going to do a concept album, don’t write a concept which reads like a nine-year-old’s idea of a horror movie. This is just impossible to listen to without rolling eyes, cringing, and wondering how the hell such an iconic metal artist thought this was a good idea, not to mention his band, label, or even management. Artists should have full control over what they create, but at the same time, there’s nothing wrong with someone tapping them on the shoulder and asking “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

The answer is “no it wasn’t.” If you want a good fix of King Diamond, go and listen to “The Eye” or “Abigail”, or “Fatal Portrait”. Save your rolling eyes from the strain of “Them”.

Warthur Emboldened by the strong performance of Abigail, King Diamond chose to follow it up with another narrative concept album, this time inserting himself into the story as a character - specifically, as a child whose sinister grandmother turns out to be in constant communication with the invisible spirits who haunt the old family home. It's a fun enough story, though it does seem that - unlike on Abigail - the narrative overpowered the music this time around, with few really standout tunes on offer; only an even more diverse and wide-ranging than usual vocal performance from King raises this album to "above average" status.

Mjöllnir Following the excellent Abigail was always going to present some difficulty, but you guessed it, there was no need to fear as the King Diamond concept formula was now perfected. I’m a huge fan of this band’s early albums but this is truly the peak of the mountain for me. “Them” is a claustrophobic, unnerving and sophisticated album hindered only by a very thin production (which even a remastering had trouble fixing). The tale of King, his grandma and “THEM” (the spirits in the house of “Amon” they communicate with via bloody tea in the story) is one that sticks in the mind for a long time.

Mercyful Fate stalwarts Timi Hansen and Michael Denner depart, to be replaced by Hal Patino and Pete Blakk respectively. Blakk makes a more than adequate sparring partner for Andy LaRocque and each song’s numerous twists and turns are sewn together by their dazzling solos. Developing further the idea of song structures moving with the demands of the story rather than a simple matter of verse followed by chorus, it adds a variety that makes it stand apart from the previous album. “The Invisible Guests” binds various sections together with a chorus that feels vigorously pulled together and opener “Welcome Home” stretches its legs to set the scene with urgent changes, always retaining a sheer headbanging goodness. “Tea” follows with a very dreamy vocal style from King which develops the unsettling atmosphere.

The album’s story is connected through the songs more smoothly than on Abigail, with the silences in between feeling like moments to intake a deep breath before the next part of the tale is revealed. Later tracks pile on a sense of hopelessness (“Mother’s Getting Weaker”) and a feeling of madness and disorientation is communicated very well through the music (“The Accusation Chair”). The title track is a short eerie instrumental, reliant on the cliches of horror soundtracks maybe, but very effective nonetheless. Also, by the end of the album it’s clear that things are not quite done with yet...

Not everyone enjoys this album to the same level as the last one, and it requires a fair amount of work to wipe away the cobwebs of the production to find the gleaming gems beyond but it is worth it. Rounding off my edition is an intriguing alternative “ending” track, and some rough mixes which are so-so. Once again, the sleeve art is great and reigns the viewer into the concentrated sphere of the story. To be continued...