"True metal" fanatism on a supposed news article

Are you serious about taking that seriously?

I call bullshit. That just can't be real. 

I�m pretty sure it�s a joke.

So by mere incident I found this, hum, "news" article:

http://www.examiner.com/article/czech-republic-strikes-a-blow-against-false-metal?CID=examiner_alerts_article

It's such a lousy piece that I'm going to do here a debunking of the article in question. NOTE: I strongly advise you to read the linked article before actually reading my rant, or at least to skip my debunking.

Randy Blythe, lead singer for nu-style "metal" band Lamb of God, has been arrested in the Czech Republic for having shoved a fan off a stage; the fan later died of a brain hemorrhage that may have been caused by the incident.

Nu-style? As in n�-metal? Are you kidding? Musically, Lamb of God have absolutely nothing to do with n�-metal. They're a metalcore band with strong roots in melodic death metal and groove thrash, end of story.

Many commentators have focused on the fact that this is a legally dubious prosecution. First, these things are generally handled in civil court, because the fault was obviously that of stage security, who allowed people to rush the stage. Second, it's unclear whether Blythe was aware that these consequences could result. In other words, people stage dive all the time and if they get injured, those are the breaks.

So this is an example of a great job at telling things we already know.

Why, then, would the Czech government push forward for a prosecution? It could be that this is extortion, as is common in third-world-level civilizations like those of Eastern Europe.

Calling Czech Republic a third world level civilization is a vast act of ignorance itself. Plus, while corruption is indeed very common on poor countries (note: I know that Czech Republic isn't a poor country), I've never seen any studies that relate poverty with extorsions for the sake of extorsions.

More likely, however, this is the Czech government recognizing what we've all known: Lamb of God is false metal that is attempting to subvert metal by conforming it to crowd expectations, making it easily assimilated by mainstream rock music.

I'd call this the most unlikely possibility. First of all this accusation was made by the Czech police and not by the government.
Second point, classifying Lamb of God as false metal is falling in a deep mistake (I've already stated my reasons earlier). You can dislike them, you can hate them, but you can't quite deny them.
Third - and possibly the most pertinent - point, fusion genres in metal are more often the result of minds with extremely wide musical influences than "musicians" who are trying to make something accessible and popular.  The mentality Brett Stevens is promoting is the mentality of following a very narrow path, which is precisely the opposite of what metal is meant to be.

By throwing Blythe in jail, the Czechs have struck a blow against false metal by saying it will not be tolerated in the Czech Republic, and probably should not be tolerated elsewhere. If this prosecution is successful nu-metal, shoegaze, indie-metal, black punk and metalcore musicians should fear arrest worldwide for simple crimes.

This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. First of all the Czech Republic will have struck a blow against METAL in general, not mallcore, by punishing an individual involved in an accident associated with typical metal show behaviour. The Czech Republic doesn't have the international power and presence to force-feed that blow into other countries as well.

Jaywalking, for example, could lead to a fifteen-year sentence in a Turkish prison. Not paying cigarette taxes could result in hard labor in the underground mines of Germany for a decade. Texas could conceivably execute nu-metallers for violating the state's aesthetic incompetence laws. While the newer generation of false "metalheads," namely the neckbearded emo indie-rocker hipsters who are pretending to like metal so they have some "authenticity" among their hipster friends, are going to band together and "white knight" about the horrible injustice to our metal martyr, Randy Blythe, all true metalheads should celebrate the Czech Republic and its brave strike against false metal.

Injustice is injustice, regardless of how much one likes (or not) the victim. The kind of punishment suggested by Stevens showcases a fanatism very akin to the one boasted by religious intolerants. Also interesting is the fact that Stevens lumps together various kinds of characters that have nothing to do with eachother except for the fact that he hates them all (neckbeards, emos, indies, hipsters) which a prevailing element  in fascist propaganda.

As the saying goes, "All that requires for stupidity to win is that unstupid people do nothing," and the nu-styles of metal (metalcore, deathcore, nu-metal, indie-metal, shoegaze-black, emo, black punk) are obviously stupid and contrary to the spirit of metal. They seek to humble that spirit, make it more hipster and sociable, and to crush metal from within.

Again, everything that "false metal" tries to do is to speak the heart of the musician who grew with varied styles of music and wants to tribute all of them. The only thing contrary to the spirit of metal here is Stevens himself who is showcasing narrow minded try-hard views which are pretty common among wannabe poser metalheads who think they're true metalheads by hating on these bands.

For that reason, the numu invasion should be opposed "by any means necessary," which includes rounding up numu musicians and throwing them into jail for 15 years of starvation, sodomitic rape and daily beatings. The Czech Republic has struck a brave first blow in this quest and all true metalheads should fly the Czech flag proudly on this day.

Again, fanatism. I personally think all true metalheads should unite themselves for Blythe's freedom, regardless if they're LoG fans or not, because of the circunstances of his arrest and the fact that his arrest may cause deep changes and even restrains for metal festivals and shows in the future.

Discuss.

Edited by DefinitionOfHatred - 14 Jul 2012 at 12:25pm