Vim Fuego
If you go by the old saying “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” when you look at Splitroast, and then find it offensive, it’s your own fucking fault! In this case, the cover is telling the truth.
This less than classy little split album from Western Australia features a spooky looking labiascape cover, like a vaginal “Altars of Madness” or a gynaecological take on Obituary’s “The End Complete”. Inside, Cuntscrape’s artwork features a bearded man having his vagina probed with a stethoscope by a doctor. Death Fucking Cunt are pictured sitting around a tomb vandalized with the phrase “smash sack, sniff petrol, praise Allah”. It’s the perfect cover for filthy pornogrind and deviant death metal, which is exactly what the Mighty ‘Scrape and D.F.C. deliver.
Cuntscrape’s comedy grind is actually pretty well executed, combining highly inappropriate porno samples (A woman puking. A man says “Oh shoot! OK, you coulda used the dog dish. It’s no good. My house smells like sperm”, from “Technical Brutal Death Metal Song”) snatched from fuck knows where, with tight but stupid music. How stupid? Try song titles like “The Veiny Shaft of Justice”, “Uncle Nasty Fingers”, and “Mayonnasian”. “Breastaurant” has an almost blues-y swagger, reminiscent of the occasional flourish by fellow Aussie grinders Blood Duster. “Finntrollop” is a bang on piss take of Finntroll’s humppa-metal. The Middle Eastern-themed “Hommusexual” features ululation, and a yobbo taunt of “eat some meat, ya pansy!” In between all the parodies and porno though, these guys grind like a motherfucker.
Death Fucking Cunt deal in great slabs of brutal, technical death metal. If you like Suffocation, Dying Fetus, Deeds of Flesh, or any other band of that ilk, you will like the four tracks on show here. There’s the constant percussion barrage, the bestial vocals, the heavy, distorted, technical riffs, the breakneck tempos, and songs which are completely indistinguishable from one another. That’s not necessarily a criticism- if you like what happens in the first few seconds of “Flexus Plexus”, you’re probably going to like “hothorses.com”, “Light Beer = Intense Queer” and “Insane Cumsore” too.
The whole “Splitroast” package is intense and perverted. It is misogynistic, slightly homophobic, anti-vegetarian, racially insensitive, a little zoophilic, and childishly offensively funny. It’s also a damn good listen, for lovers of well-produced goregrind and brutal death metal. Anyone upset or offended by it simply doesn’t understand the purpose of “Splitroast”, and shouldn’t be listening in the first place.