ANAL GRIND — Chronic Pornoholic (review)

ANAL GRIND — Chronic Pornoholic album cover Album · 2012 · Pornogrind Buy this album from MMA partners
2.5/5 ·
siLLy puPPy
Pornogrind certainly has to have the lowest nutritional value of any kind of metal. It’s white bread and basically just converts all the starch to a toxic form of sugar. It’s simply a one-trick pony but many are drawn to it for that very reason. It struts its mid-groove swagger like punk run amok and then starts every track out with cheap clips from porn flicks. The musicianship is substandard and the themes do not tackle any existential quandaries of the universe.

ANAL GRIND originated in Navapolatsk, Belarus before relocating to Moscow where the band has found a small but eager audience ready to hear this stuff. ANAL GRIND released several released starting with the promotional demo “Cuntripping” in 2006 and are still active to this very day. This album CHRONIC PORNOHOLIC was one of the easiest to sample but i would guess that every release pretty much sounds the same because most of this shit usually does!

This release features 20 tracks at around 40 1/2 minutes making them all about 2 minutes average which is typical for many of the core subs. Graced with attacks like “Latina Face Fucking,” “Spermaholic Slutfest” and “Nice Cunt Expansion,” ANAL GRIND does a great job in dreaming up adolescent male track titles and doesn’t even do a bad job with its chugga chug grind style. On top of piggy squeals are some other vocal appearances that often sound cartoonish in how they go up and down scales.

“Hell’s Balls” is particularly amusing as it’s a parody of the AC/DC song and it goes without saying that pornogrind in general is designed for comedic value because it’s absolutely impossible to take any of it seriously for even a microsecond. The album actually feels like a grind version of rock and roll as it has that bounce however and it’s not a bad sound. It’s just unfortunate that the majority of the tracks sound exactly the same as the next.

Still waiting for a pornogrind album that’s actually creative and sophisticated but it doesn’t seem likely that majorly talented musicians would be attracted to this little cesspool in the the greater metal universe. Probably my least favorite style of metal, not due to the subject matter but for the lack of innovation and entertainment value. ANAL GRIND does nothing to change my opinion on that matter. Some of the videos are fun though. Lots of pyromania, vomiting, tits and screaming! Oh yeah! Actually better than a lot of pornogrind but still fairly average for grind.
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