AGENTS OF SATAN — The Old Testament (review)

AGENTS OF SATAN — The Old Testament album cover Boxset / Compilation · 2003 · Hardcore Punk Buy this album from MMA partners
3/5 ·
siLLy puPPy
Powerviolence is a unique subgenre of extreme punk / metal / core music that took off like a wildfire in the late 80s and early 90s all throughout the state of California. Somewhat based on a mix of hardcore punk and grindcore, this bizarre hybrid excelled at unexpected hairpin turns that often incorporated doomy sludge metal riffs and lots of sound samples. Just one such band was AGENTS OF SATAN that formed in 1995 from the previous band Radioactive Lunch in San Mateo, CA. The members were Lord Balsac (vocals), Ramon Salcido (bass) and Dead Junkie (drums). While mostly free of guitar, there were a couple guitarists incorporated for brief periods.

Like many such powerviolence groups whose mission was to unleash the ultimate skronkcore possible, this band has a messy canon of demos, splits and EPs but never released a true bonafide album in its own right however this compilation THE OLD TESTAMENT is one of those all-encompassing releases that takes care of that and pretty much gathers together every track from all those disparate releases and creates a one-stop shop opportunity including some live and unreleased material not previously available. Also included is the ridiculously impossible to find Radioactive Lunch 7” that preceded the official moniker switcheroo to AGENTS OF SATAN.

THE OLD TESTAMENT gathers together a whopping 43 tracks that only add up to a mere near 45 minutes of playing time. That’s barely a minute per track as an average with some like “Silver In Christ’s Comhole” lasting only 25 seconds and the lengthiest “Goat Skrote” hitting an unthinkable 2.5 minutes. The instruments are limited to bass and drums and a wide-range of spastic vocal styles fluctuating from low guttural growls to manic screaming and high-pitched shrieks and squeals that offer shrill irritations to the heavily distorted bass riffs that emulate a guitar that deliver grindcore freneticism, doom-laden sludge riffs and moments of pure chaotic turbulence. The drums pretty much follow suit by playing in tandem with the bass and also free falling into complete disorder but always offering plenty of noisy bombast.

The powerviolence compositional style is much more diverse than the regular punk and core styles of metal as it excels in sudden tempo changes, dynamics shifting and the abstract use of chaos and order. The main problem i personally have with AGENTS OF SATAN is the lack of guitar usage and although there are claims that guitarists existed in this band, i personally don’t hear any throughout this collection but then again the heavy distortion is so thick and murky that there very well could be a guitar riff or two and never know the difference much like the guitar and bass fusion of lo-fi black metal. Basically this is pretty crazy stuff crafted for the ultimate shock value. Song titles include: “Shredded Clitoris And Foreskin,” “Rape Your Ass With Drugs,” “Cut Off My Dick” and “Vomit Tar.”

For those into the skronkiest noise bands then this will be a treat for sure. The album definitely has its moments but as a whole doesn’t really scratch that itch. Unexpected elements include a wide variety of spoken word samples which Satanic themes and micro-intermissions of hip hop but for the most past this is a celebration of loud noisy youthful angst which wants to exist in the nasty boyz club. Musically this is more developed than many punk bands but as a metal band doesn’t quite hit the mark but then again powerviolence is category of extreme rock that sits somewhere in between. Not as accomplished as bands like No Less, Nails or Magrudergrind but not a bad listen for what it is and a nice little specimen of the San Francisco Bay Area underground.

Tracklist

Demo & Split 7" With Burn The Priest 1 –Agents Of Satan Black Scabs 2 –Agents Of Satan Rape Your Ass With Drugs 3 –Agents Of Satan Snowmen 4 –Agents Of Satan Red Impulse 5 –Agents Of Satan Goatcore 6 –Agents Of Satan Pusher

Unholy Ascension 7" 7 –Agents Of Satan Unholy Ascension 8 –Agents Of Satan H. O. G. 9 –Agents Of Satan Crosshairs 10 –Agents Of Satan Posted 11 –Agents Of Satan Sliver In Christ's Cornhole 12 –Agents Of Satan Vomit Tar 13 –Agents Of Satan Crust = Glam 14 –Agents Of Satan Snatch In Your Eye / Necrotal Ulceration

From El Guapo Compilation LP 15 –Agents Of Satan Raped Priest 16 –Agents Of Satan Cut Off My Dick

Split 7" With No Less 17 –Agents Of Satan Black Metal Bat 18 –Agents Of Satan Goat Skrote

Accidental Double Homicide 2x7" Compilation 19 –Agents Of Satan Butcher Knife

Autopsy, Mayhem, Hardsound CD Compilation 20 –Agents Of Satan Agents No Le$$

Split 7" With No Less 21 –Agents Of Satan Klawbo Connection

Split 7" With Noothgrush 22 –Agents Of Satan Shredded Clitoris And Foreskin 23 –Agents Of Satan Snort Fat Lines Of Crank 24 –Agents Of Satan West Bay Coalition

Live On KFJC June 1995 25 –Agents Of Satan March Of The A. O. S. 26 –Agents Of Satan Rape Your Ass With Drugs 27 –Agents Of Satan Goatcore 28 –Agents Of Satan Snowmen 29 –Agents Of Satan Red Impulse

Live On KFJC 27 Nov 1996 30 –Agents Of Satan Vomit Tar 31 –Agents Of Satan Cut Off My Dick 32 –Agents Of Satan Castigo Del Brujo

Radioactive Lunch 7" 33 –Radioactive Lunch I Hate You 34 –Radioactive Lunch Ten Pounds Of Tots 35 –Radioactive Lunch Cake 36 –Radioactive Lunch Toupé 37 –Radioactive Lunch Magic Shell 38 –Radioactive Lunch After The War 39 –Radioactive Lunch Crackbabies 40 –Radioactive Lunch Buttsweat 41 –Radioactive Lunch Rumproast 42 –Radioactive Lunch Gangstaa

Unreleased 43 –Radioactive Lunch Pot Cookies
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